Friday, August 01, 2008

I CAN BECAUSE I SAY?


I've been rereading "The Dilbert Future" this morning, revisiting one of the most interesting chapters in the book. Scott Adams, creator of the Dilbert comic strip, has enjoyed some phenomenal success as a cartoonist. One of the secrets to his success, as he explains in "The Dilbert Future" is the technique of affirmations. Using the technique, he was able to make a killing in the stock market, pass the GMAT and earn an MBA, become a successful syndicated cartoonist, hold the Nos. 1 and 2 spot on the New York Times bestseller list and even dodge cancer.

The technique that Adams said he followed is basically this: Every day he would write, "I, SCOTT ADAMS, WILL GET / DO / ACCOMPLISH WHATEVER" 15 times. According to his instructions in "The Dilbert Future," he would stop if he didn't observe any movement toward the goal for six months. He also said you don't need any faith in the affirmations in order for them to work.

In other words, he tricked himself. Against all the odds and evidence that suggested the contrary, he wrote down goals that flew in the face of sanity. And they came to be.

Affirmations work (in theory) because they bend your brain into accepting an impossibility. The repetition of the idea creates a seed in the subconscious mind, which germinates and, like a weed, grows over other parts of your brain that might hold you back from a goal.

A skeptical, not-very-religious person like me has a lot of problems with affirmations, because it feels like I'm tricking myself. If I write, "I, Joe Hadsall, will write a first novel that will make the New York Times bestseller list," it feels like I'm taking the time to actively delude myself and engage a childish fantasy. I go through the same process when I practice magic. As I practiced the classic pass, I thought that there was no way I would ever master it. I'd think things like, "That break is obvious. There's no way I can hide that card flashing. That noise gives everything away." Yet I still practiced it, thinking all those things I saw would get better. But now, my pass is pretty good. Even though I still see all those things I see in practice, I'm able to use them pretty effectively.

It can't really be that easy, can it? It's really hard for me to believe they can work, but I want them to work. So here goes:

I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.
I, Joe Hadsall, will have three short stories published in major fiction magazines.

Wow, 18 times. I overachieved, without copy-pasting. This is fairly ironic, considering the post below.

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Comments:
Hi Son: I believe you will get those short stories published. You are a good writer. Love, Mom
 
I, Nikki Hess, will see the Phillies win the World Series this year.

I, Nikki Hess, will see the Phillies win the World Series this year.

(I can't type any more of that because I'm laughing so hard at my lovable but hapless baseball team... I guess this technique only works when it's your OWN goal and not a goal you want somebody else to have! Dammit.)
 
Just in case you're right:

I, Joe Hadsall, will see the Saints win the Super Bowl.
I, Joe Hadsall, will see the Saints win the Super Bowl.
I, Joe Hadsall, will see the Saints win the Super Bowl.
 
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